I’ve been seeing a lot of messaging lately basically saying “Peace Out 2020, don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”. Boy, do I understand. I don’t think there’s a single soul out there that hasn’t been deeply touched by what has taken place this year. This gut-wrenching, heartbreaking year.
Personally, I have watched the career that I’ve spent many years building get whisked away overnight. I’ve lost loved ones. I’ve spent more time this year with my thoughts than ever before and trust me, that’s not always pretty. I have danced this year with sadness and overwhelm in a way that I never have and it scared the hell out of me. I have worried myself sick over my own health and the health of those that I love. I have missed people and connection like I never knew possible. I have longed for hugs and coffee dates. I have grieved the community that I used to get every single day just by stepping into a yoga studio or running into a friend.
All of that and yet, I am still hesitant to just wish this year away. You see, this year was the suckiest of suck and also the most beautiful of them all. I have learned to sit with myself and not busy my feelings away. I have had time to think about those that I miss most and who I want to prioritize time with in the future. I have learned to pivot in my career and have found that connection with others even over muted Zoom classes. I’ve taken more long walks with friends than ever before and have been blessed to find solace among the trees with these beautiful humans. I’ve gotten to spend more time with my husband than ever before. I’ve spent more time resting. I’ve also spent more time scrolling and snacking too but let’s not be judgey.
I know this year has looked different for all of us. I have some friends who have never been more overwhelmed in their lives and then there are some that are overwhelmed by not being overwhelmed. My heart aches for those who are putting their health on the line every single day just by showing up at work or who are pouring every ounce of energy into teaching a classroom full of students in a whole new way or those who are scared of losing everything they have.
Damn. There are so many lessons in this year. Let’s not rush that away. Let’s take the time to be with it. And while we’re at it, let’s remember that January 1, 2021 is another day in this beautiful life. Things will not magically change because the calendar does. Let’s be patient. Let’s keep missing one another. Let’s keep each other safe. My hope for 2021 is that we start thinking of the collective instead of the individual but hey, I’m a dreamer.
Thank you for being here with me this year, reading my words, maybe popping in for a class or 20 and supporting me as I navigate launching a small business during a pandemic while trying not to completely lose my mind. I value you and I appreciate you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.